Gank Frank - Chapter 2

[Fenrix]

GANK FRANK
Written by Fenrix
Screenshots taken by Fenrix
Loosely based on Quentin Tarantino's Kill Bill






Chapter 1: 11 (elite)
Chapter 2: Blood-Covered Gnome
Chapter 3: Showdown at the Pig and Whistle Tavern
Chapter 4: The Lonely Grave of Eliza Schultz
Chapter 5: The Tough Teachings of Noodlepuss
Chapter 6: Otto and I
Chapter 7: Final Showdown









"Somewhere in Westfall, several months ago..."















"I was going to say it was a pleasure knowing you, but we both know that's a lie. I might not have ever liked you...or your kind, for that matter. Quite infact I would /spit and /rude at you, any day of the week. But that shouldn't suggest that I don't admire your courage and tenacity..."





"Being ganked in a stunlock is a luxury that our kind is rarely afforded. My gift, to you...!!!"

BOOP!

"Aw, what the hell is this?"


Frank whispers: Otto, you're going to abandon the quest.
Otto whispers: WHUT?!
Frank whispers: He deserves better than that.
Otto whispers: HE DOSENTT DESERV SHITT!!!1!one!!!"
Frank whispers: Would you stop using your Capslock, please.
Otto whispers: he doesnt deserve shit!
Frank whispers: We're not going to do that to that poor Gnome. We've done enough already.
Otto whispers: sigh fine, whutevs
Frank whispers: <3 <3.
Otto whispers: yah, yah
Frank whispers: Pick up some [Ice Cold Milk] on your way back, plz. Thx.
Otto whispers: OKAUY LAVE ME ALON!!!!1
Frank whispers: Okay, bye.
Otto whispers: BYE!
Frank whispers: Cya.
Otto whispers: STFU gosh
You are now ignoring Frank.





"Bet you thought that was pretty fuckin' funny, didn't you? Word of advice, you little shit -- DON'T YOU EVER accept a Rez."

"And pray to God you don't have a Soulstone."








Several seconds later...











/GASP!
/pant...

"I didn't know how long I was out. I tried to check my wristwatch, but it was gone, along with my wallet and several other personal belongings I did not care to count."






"Tuh...twelve...twelve seconds?!...No, it can't be!! Twe...tweleve whole seconds?! You BASTARDS!!!"

"I quickly scanned my nearby surroundings, hoping they hadn't taken it. I prayed they hadn't taken it. The one precious thing to me in this world, my one true partner in crime. My friend, my comrade. The only soul I could ever trust in my entire life..."

...


"Mr. Wiggles."





"What was once a warm, friendly smile at my side was now a cold, empty space. I sobbed uncontrollably."

"I heard a voice coming from around the corner. I wiped away the tears and quickly laid back down."





"I'm telling you, this is the real deal. 100% quality true Gnome meat. Fresh, too. This sucker is squirmy. And when I say squirmy, I mean squirmy. Like a bucket of eels with diarrhea groovin' to the Electric Slide on a glass tabletop, kind of squirmy. You dig that, don't you?"






"Yeah...but I ain't payin' until I taste the goods."

"Fair enough. Oh, by the way, this one's a little bland, you might wanna try seasoning him up with some of this."









<Knives Sharpening>

"I had heard enough. He held his sharpened utencils with eager anticipation, hoping to snag a 'bite.' Unfortunately for him, I wasn't stunlocked anymore. I was awake. I was angry. I had several questions that needed immediate answering."

"And if there is one thing you don't want, it's an angry gnome skilled in the dark arts with several pressing questions on his mind."





"As if the already grim situation for our unfortunate antagonist wasn't bad enough, I wasn't completely defenseless. The one thing my attackers left me with...one of the greatest Gnomish Inventions since the Mechanical Squirrel..."

"Was my trusty spork."

"He poked. I parried. Riposte took care of the rest..."

"I twisted the spork in, just to make sure he could feel it."





"AAAGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!"

"He felt it."

"It didn't take long for his accomplice to come back, either..."
_________________
Gank Frank - A Raging Rumble of Retribution...

[Fenrix]

"Hey man, havin' yourself a good snack there? Uhhh..."

"...Whoa..."


*KA-SHINK*

"I popped a Slice and Dice, and went to work on my captor's lower parts. Needless to say he wouldn't be walking for a while."






"WHERE'S FRANK?"

"I-- I dunno who Frank is..!!"






"BULLSHIT!!!"





"Puh--please, stop Sinister Striking me..."

"WHERE'S FRANK?"

"Suddenly, I had what some alcoholics refer to as a 'moment of clarity.' The situation felt all too familiar to me. A voice came, then the images soon followed..."




<Enter...FLASHBACK MODE!>






"Oooo-wee! Look what we have here..looks like...LUNCH! Hahaha...!"






"...My name's PETE...an' I'm here ta' EAT...huh, huh huh..."




<Exit...FLASHBACK MODE!>







"You're name is PETE...right...? And you came here to get something to EAT...right...?"

"Jus--just ho, hold on now, lil' guy..."





"GAHHHHH!!"





"I looted a pair of Mechanostrider keys from him."

"The key ring had the letters, 'CYBR-WGN' etched on to them."

"Fuckin' sick-o."










"Bingo."

"As I lay next to Pete's seat, trying to gather myself, boggling at the situation -- I could suddenly see in my mind the flakking glits who had done this to me, and the nubs responsible. I started with a list of faces. Sometimes, thats all you need. The first person on my list was the easiest to find...But when one manages the difficult task of becoming the Head Kingpin of the Stormwind Underworld, one doesn't exactly keep it secret, does one?"





"Edwin VanCleef was born into a war-torn world, and was charged with rebuilding Stormwind after the Orcs razed it during the First War. The Half-Ninja / Half-Pirate son of a Stormwind Stonemason brat grew up living a state of constant confusion, not really sure of his own role in life. Constantly tormented by important life questions. Was he a Ninja? Was he a Pirate? And if not one nor the other, what the hell would he dress up for on Halloween?"





"Frank saw VanCleef's potential from a young age. At the age of twenty, Frank saw an opportunity to strengthen his grip within the Human City of Stormwind as part of a power struggle against the other mafia leaders seeking to claim a piece of the vice as their own. He appointed VanCleef to sit on the Crime Council on his behalf. When the final sword was sheathed, it was VanCleef and his own personal army, the Defias Brotherhood, that emerged victorious. And just in case you're wondering...how does a Half-Ninja, Half-Pirate Kid become Head Kingpin of the Stormwind Underworld? Well, I'll tell you. VanCleef's origin came up before the council only once...the night he assumed power."






"Does anyone else have a problem with this? I mean, our father's fathers built this council with their bare hands. I think they'd be turning in their graves right now if they knew about how we've disgraced them here tonight."

"Disgraced? What do you mean, disgraced? We should be celebrating! Now shut up, and eat your [Delicious Cake], dammit!"





"Please, let him speak."

"What do you mean, disgraced? What do you speak of?"





"What I'm talking about is...this council, which I love more than my own sweet epics..."

"IS MAKING A HALF-NINJA, HALF-PIRATE WHINEY EMO KID IT'S LEADER!!!"















"Just so you understand how serious I am, I will say this to you in Common."



"As your leader...I am always truly eager and open to hear any sort of questions you might have regarding my actions. And I promise you, from this moment on out -- that you can approach me with any subject you wish to speak of. Except of course...the subject that was just brought up. Let me spell it out for you -- The consequences for bringing up either my Pirate or Ninja heritage in the negative sense, of course...I cut off your fuckin' head, and give you a fuckin' fifty DKP minus."


"Now if any of you fuckin' NOBS, GOT ANYTHING ELSE to say to me, NOW'S THE FUCKIN' TIME!!!"



"...Good, I didn't think so."







"VanCleef had killed an innumerable amount of newbie players on his ship in the Deadmines. If a low level even set foot near his ship, him and his entire crew would aggro and gangbang the entire group. He also took part in the stunlocking and ganking of an innocent Gnome and his Piglet at a tiny Inn in Westfall. But that day, he made one BIG mistake..."

"He should've ganked TWO."


"But, before satisfaction could be mine...first thing's first..."






"Boggle your big toe."







"Good, hard part's over..."

"Now...time to find me a weapon."











Stay tuned for Chapter 3.
_________________
Gank Frank - A Raging Rumble of Retribution...

[Fenrix]

This one's a big one!!! Brace yourself!!!

Almost 40 images in this sucker. Most of which I had to create from scratch!!! I apologize for not posting this sooner, but this particular Chapter required an IMMENSE amount of editing. I spent several days just splicing stuff in.

Anywho, hope you like it! For Chapter 3, I will be asking you all for help! But, that will be several weeks from now. Geffen and I will contact you about being in Chapter 3 and what you need to do / bring.

ENJOY!

-Fen
_________________
Gank Frank - A Raging Rumble of Retribution...

[Zarko]

I love you.

Sign me up for Chapter 3.

Mage or Warrior.

Doesn't matter.

Warrior has a mohawk and the black leather straps around his face, so he might look cooler. Mage is bald. Both undead.

Marry me.
_________________

[Destructus]

Sure....I star in your new epic, I work for peanuts, I even let you stab me with a spork...and not even one mention of me in the credits. My lawyer will be contacting you shortly (yeah, I said SHORTly).

Nice job, Fen.

P.S - is it true the rumor I hear that Ghaz wears womens lingerie under his tank gear and secretly goes by the name Destructusjr?

Hmm....

[Aili]

Fen, Once again, amazing job man! This is top-notch work, my little friend.
My only advice, find some human actors who arent soo ugly. I mean that Destructus guy? Come on, WTB George Clooney. You know where to find me if/when you need help with chapter 3

<3 Ailiton The Awesome
_________________
GHAZKULL MORTAL STRUCK ME!

[Reldaw]

Wow, that story by itself is epic.
Can't wait for you to start on part 3!
_________________

I'm a gnome. Hug me.

[Bunnybane]

I have a cute little Gnome that can be your love interest.....

(Or a big green Orc for that matter)

[Damori]

Very nice, very nice. Really looking forward to the rest of this. If you ever need a female moocow, I happen to have one. Watch out though, she's into totems and spirit animals.

[maugen]

Man I love these! Really creative and funny! My warrior would love to star in his own film (orc, purple ponytail), and I have a troll mage (red tall topknot), 16 Shaman Moocow, and a lvl 9 bag o bones (blonde mohawk). Keep em coming!
_________________
-=Dumb as they Come=-
Now with [Maugen's Bag of Rocks]!

[Baba]

The legendary quality continues!!! awesome!
_________________
Baba
--

Drunk as fuck!
RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE!!

[Oogra]

This is absolutely awesome, Fen-fen!

A bit later I'm going to go and snatch all those pics and store them here, so we can be sure to have a permanent copy at FT even if those image hosting sites go down.

I've created a new usergroup entitled <<Best Gnomes Ever>> and made Fenrix moderator.
_________________
Chiknoogra
"ima chikn"

DRUNK AS FUCK

My name is BUBBA!

AKA Harumph, mage and curmudgeon!

[Zol]

Oh em gee.. this was amazing! Again!

Let me know if you need a sexy troll mage for your next chapter

[Nulap]

Definetly two sheeps up, way up on this one!
_________________
Sure, it's your $14.95 a month to play as you want, but in a group it's our $59.80 and we think you're retarded.

[Fenrix]

Thanks for the responses, keep them coming! I really enjoying reading people's reactions.

And thank you for the new Usergroup, Oogra! Reldaw, you know what to do.

Is it okay if I post this link on the 'Hoof forums? I didn't want to make the server 'splode, but the 'Hoof forums don't allow image hotlinking so it kind of ruins the story. I think Yummy ended up dropping the link to everyone on the forums for Chapter 1, and everything seemed to work okay. Just thought I'd ask, though.

-Fen
_________________
Gank Frank - A Raging Rumble of Retribution...